What Makes Me Really Happy...

Today I'm playing catch-up.  Here we go, Day 14 on Day 18, ten things that make me really happy:

1.  A good night's sleep or a much needed nap, especially in clean sheets.
2.  Sitting down and reading a magazine from cover to cover.
3.  Snuggling with my kids.
4.  Laughing so hard it makes my cheeks and/or my stomach hurt.
5.  Getting great deal on something I really wanted.
6.  Shopping with my mom and sister.
7.  Watching cheesy Christmas movies, under a warm blanket with a cup of Chai Tea. (This only happens during the holidays.)
8.  Helping my kids learn something new or when one of my students at work finally gets it or when they are engaged in what we are doing in class.
9.  Swimming.
10.  Being able to capture a special moment with a picture.

Public Apology

Dear Family,

I apologize for my lack of patience.  Some days it all gets used up with the big kids I teach at work.  They do their best to get to me and most of the time I make it home with a tiny bit of patience in my reserve.  I try to not let the toddlerness get to me but lately I just can't seem to get past it.  I know you are little people trying to learn  your limits and I'm trying my best to keep calm when you repeatedly ignore my requests or shriek/scream when you don't get your way.  I promise I will try harder to relish in the little moments that make me love being your mommy. Oh, and I'll promise I WILL make dinner for you more than once this week so you can learn good eating habits.

Mr. P, I'm sorry to letting my mind get in the way of my heart.  I still struggle every day with baby-wanting fever, even though we are so lucky to have two jumping, screaming, giggling toddlers running around our house.  I get stuck in the fact that my body doesn't work the way it should and that interferes with other wife stuff.  You are certainly growing into being a daddy and I am so glad that you are able to calm the shriek/screaming little girl when I can't do it anymore and that you and I are on the same page with a certain little boy who is testing us. 

Love,
Mommy

Non-related picture of the perfect spring evening we had here.  Can't wait for summer!

I miss...

(I'm really liking these posts that I can just write a list.)

• Free time.  You remember the days, don't you?  It was summer vacation and you were childless and you didn't have any obligations or anything to do.  I love just sitting with my scrapbooking stuff and creating or sitting on the couch vegging or wandering around the store looking for nothing in particular or staying up late and sleeping until you felt like getting up.
• Living near/with my friends.  I often need outfit advice and I miss having friends that live in the next room.  Our I'm watching The Bachelor and I need someone to talk to.
• Working out.  My body seems to fail me a lot lately; my shoulders hurt when I swim, my knee hurts when I run and so on.  I miss working up a sweat, pushing myself, and the great feeling I had when I was done.  Maybe yoga will be my answer, now I just need to find the time.
• Snugly babies.  Or I should say MY snugly babies.  One of my favorite parts of being a mom is napping with my tiny little baby.  The heavy weight on your chest, you just can't beat it.  Not to say you can't snuggle with a toddler, it is just more like holding a barn cat.

Me and E almost a week after she got home from the hospital.

An out of order response to writing most days in May.

Sell yourself in 10 words or less:

Passionate
Creative
Curious
Compassionate
Empathetic
Supportive
Planner
Analytical
Flexible
Patient

The Thing I'm Most Afraid of...

is losing those who are close to me.  About once I week I get this brief moment of panic when I think of losing one of my kids.  I just don't know what I would do and I really don't know how parents can move on after that.  I don't have anxiety or panic about them getting hurt or falling down but mostly as I tuck them in the thought flashes through my mind. 

Other than that deeper fear I also a really afraid of SNAKES!  I hate them.  Our new house has snakes and I'm already getting nervous for the warmer weather?  Any thoughts on how I can keep them out of our backyard?

**I'm running about a day behind, oops!

Favorite Quote

I love quotes, and words, and typography.  It is always nice to refer to someone else's words when you can't find the right ones.  So that being said I have a number of favorite quotes, or ones that speak to me. 

This first one I heard when I was in high school and I still love it.

Some other favorites that I try to remember about how to act.

And then a couple of quotes that describe me.

Uncomfortable.

Things that make me uncomfortable:

1. Awkward hugs and cheek kisses.  You know the kind, mostly the ones you aren't ready for, you're not standing in the right spot, or if you're a teacher to older children, the ones where their head hits in a bad spot and they go in for an unexpected front hug.  I'm not naturally a hugger so most of the time it is uncomfortable.
2. Confrontation.  I'm a typical middle child and I dislike conflict.  I don't like having to confront anyone... a co-worker, a store clerk, or the person who answers the customer service line.  I also get uncomfortable around other people conflict.  I have many friends who love the Real Housewives of ___________ but I just can't do it, to much fighting for me.
3. Perceived social awkwardness.  You know when you see someone, or hear someone start to say something that isn't right for the situation or the audience.  I get uncomfortable for them.  Maybe I'm too empathetic.
4. Running while anyone is watching.  Another good reason why I don't run anymore. 
5. Ending phone calls that aren't going anywhere... sorry mom.