Failure

Today was one of those days that I feel like a failure.

The morning started off pretty good.  I got up.  The kids got up.  I finished drying my hair and getting ready and the kids played in our room.  No one lost an eye.  S didn't stick q-tips in his ears.  I made the kids breakfast.  The babysitter came and I managed to get to work on time.

Once at work I realized and remembered the feeling...failure.  I wasn't ready for the day.  I for sure wasn't/am not ready for my class to show up tomorrow.

I got home and the kids were happy.  Not so happy to see me but they were happy with the babysitter.  S was trying to get the babysitter to hold him instead of me when she was trying to leave.  I thought your kids are supposed to want you not who watches them all day... failure.

We had to go to the grocery store.  I really don't like taking both kids alone.  It is hard, really hard.  After I strapped a screaming, hitting, back arching littler girl into her car seat we were off.  (Little miss is super attached to my purse.  It is the first thing she does when I get home.)  On another note.  My little baby girl is a hitter.  Big time.  Me. Her brother. The dog.  I don't know where she learned it but it is bad.

Made it into the store.  Managed to get one child into the car cart.  When I tried to put S in with his sister I was met with more screaming...fail.  So S just got to sit in the cart and talk to me. 

We made it almost through all the shopping.  Once we hit the check out things really fell apart.  I just don't understand what they expect those of use who need the cart with seating for more than one child to do once we take them out.  Nineteen month old twins don't listen very well and it is very hard to find my shopper reward card while trying to contain the two of them.  Not to mention the fact that they didn't have a cart for my groceries to go into so I couldn't put one child in there.  And then they sent the bagger to a different line.  Argh... fail for them? 

So after corralling the two kids and trying to pay and look some what sane I attempted to put an uncooperative child into the cart.  It took only 3 tries.  Fail.

While putting E in the cart and carrying a 30 lb. S we slowly made it to the car.  Once I put S into the car I returned to the cart to find that E had found the grapes and was helping herself to them.  After yet another fit, since I had to take the grapes to put her into the car, every one in and safe.

Hitting, screaming children at the grocery store = a feeling of failure.  It was really just E, and she was hungry.  I should have avoided the store but with kids showing up at work tomorrow and back-to-school night on Thursday there just wasn't another day to do it.  Needless to say I'm going to be avoiding the store for a few weeks.